Kiley's 6th B-day!

For Kiley's birthday my dad flew into town to spend the day with her.  We stayed pretty busy celebrating kiley's 6th birthday.

We started the morning by bringing birthday donuts to her school class.  (we did birthday donuts because it was a half day at school and didnt want to bring cupcakes to school in the morning)

Dad had a blast and got the kids all hyper and jumping around, luckily Kiley's teacher was able to calm them back down quickly.

We took Kiley to lunch at her favorite restaurant...McDonalds.  And get this, Dad ordered something there and ate it!  AMAZING.

We went home and began opening birthday gifts.  She got a lot.  Much more than any little girl needs.  She got a guitar from Shawn, I got her a tumbling mat, she got some palace pets, some coloring books, a flashlight friend, a purse, new bracelets, a couple new movies, and some other things I cant recall at this moment. 

We went to dinner at Long Horn steakhouse where Kiley got mac and cheese (her fav) and an ice cream sunday.  Our server also gave her a birthday card signed by her and several other staff members.

The following day Dad flew home and Kiley and I celebrated her birthday with her friends at Crystal Coast Gymnastics.  I think 11 friends showed up!  It was a full house.  She had a great time with her friends, playing in the gym, eating cake, and opening gifts.

We missed Shawn all weekend, but he was able to face time with Kiley to wish her a happy birthday.

Adoption Update #12

In addition to the 2 girls we had already submitted our PPA and photo books for, another little girl (2 yrs old in our own county) became available for adoption.  So we jumped on that and submitted our stuff for her too.

Here's what happened.  We know for sure we didn't get 2 of the 3 girls.  One of the girls we had originally been interested in was matched with a different family.  This little girl's case worker had been very excited about us initially and had stated that we were one of the families she was interested in.  But my case worker believes we were not selected because of our location to where the child is.  We are about 7 hours away.  The child's case worker would have been responsible for follow up visits and my case worker said that "caseworkers don't like to travel".

And the little 2 yr old girl from our county was also matched with a different family.  This was hard for us because we know exactly why we were not selected.  We weren't selected because the little girl is African American and her case worker specifically requested that she be placed with an African American family.  It's hard to know that we would have had a good shot except for the color of our skin.  I feel like it's racist, but my case worker explained that it's been happening a lot lately.  Children want to be surrounded by people who look like them, who act like them, who have the same believes as them.

We have not heard anything about the final girl we were interested in, but we assume we did not get her because we submitted our PPA and photo book quite a while ago.  We also know that the little girl was heavily involved with a baptist church and the case worker was trying to match the girl with a family who would continue to take her to a baptist church each Sunday where she enjoys singing in the choir.  This child is also far from us.  About 6 hours away.

I'm feeling upset, sad, emotional, and hurt.  It's really hard to read about a child that you want because we really start committing at the time we submit our PPA.  When we submit our PPA it means we want to be considered for the child.  It means we want to adopt this child.  And I shouldn't, but every time I read a profile for a child I start becoming attached.  I start thinking of how this child will become a part of our family.  I imagine what things will change and what will stay the same and wonder about the child's personality.  I get excited and anxious and then we wait.  And then we find out we aren't what they're looking for and it's hard.  It's so hard to be excited about something, something that consumes my thoughts, and then find out it's not going to happen.

I'm ranting, but I'm doing it because I want to be able to look back and see what my mood was like at different stages during this process.  Right now, my mood's not good.  Mostly I'm sad and hurt that these case workers don't seem to like us.

I talked to my case worker and she assured me that it isn't because we aren't desirable or that something's wrong with us.  She said that the case workers just might have found something in another family that would be more compatible with the child than we would.  (It's still not easy to hear, but it's really about the kids, not about us).

So that's where we are right now.  And it's hard everyday wondering when I'm going to get a call or an email with a child's profile.  I know it'll happen, but when we've been trying to adopt for so long I can't help but be impatient.

Another Farewell

Seems like he's always leaving, but hopefully this will be the last "long" deployment.  

Shawn left for Afghanistan today.  We just dropped him off with about 40 other marines from his unit.  Shawn said there would be a total of about 320 marines flying out together, so it's gonna be a full flight.

I'm already missing him, the first few days are always the hardest.  Kiley's holding up really well.  She didn't cry, but once we got home, she said she already missed Shawn.  We already sat her down and let her know that Shawn would be gone for her b-day and for x-mas.  We just didn't want those things to come as a surprise later.

Shawn should be home maybe January or February of 2014.  Can't wait for his return :)

Adoption update #11

Just a quick update, we have submitted our ppa and photo book for 2 different children.

Our stuff gets handed over to the children's case workers for review and then we wait. Our case worker Cameron said that we might hear back from them in a week, a month or possibly never. Here's the deal, there might be 10 different couples interested in the same child, so theres a little bit of competition but it's completely out of our hands now. so we wait. 

But while we wait, if other children became available we can submit our ppa and photo book for them too. 

If the case workers are interested in us, they will have us come out and meet the child. Then from there I have no idea. 

Shawn leaves in a couple days for another deployment to Afghanistan and we really did a lot of thinking about what we should do about the adoption while he's gone. We decided that if the situation happens and we are fortunate to find a child while he's gone, we are going to go ahead with the adoption. Yes, it might be difficult for me to do this without him. And yes, it might be difficult when Shawn comes home to an addition to the family. But for us, we don't want to take the chance that we might miss an amazing child. So if a child is available and we are selected, we will go through with the adoption without Shawn here. 

Shawn thinks I'm weird because every time I hear a beep that tells me Im getting an email, I always always always think its gonna be our case worker telling us about a new child or following up on one we are interested in. Even when the email comes in at midnight on a Saturday. I'm lame, I know, but I'm so excited, anxious, and hoping to hear something before Shawn leaves. 

Wish us luck!

4th of July

We spent the 4th of July with our friends Mike, Becky and their daughter Haley.  We had a BBQ at their house in New Bern, NC and then watched the fireworks.

Anyone else agree Sparklers have gone downhill since we were kids?  They SUCKED the big one.

And then Kiley got curious and touched the sparkler tip (while it was sparkling) and got a nasty burn on her finger.  It blistered immediately.  She was a trooper though and barely shed a tear.  We got some Neosporin and a bandaid on the finger and she was all better :)

All these pics were taken before the burn, otherwise there would have been no smiles from Kiley.

 

Dance Recital

Kiley had her very first dance recital today.  She's only been taking classes for about a month, but so far loves it.  She takes class at the Dance Department in Newport, NC.  Her dance teacher is the owner, Miss Lianda.

She preformed 3 different dances in the recital.  The first was a cheer dance called "The Mom Song".  The 2nd was a jazz dance to the music "We Are a Family".  And the final number was a lyrical dance to the song "It's Raining, It's Pouring".

The costume in the pictures is for the lyrical dance.  And the bright color costume was for both the cheer and jazz dances.

 

Carnival

So there was this little tiny carnival in Havelock this week so we decided to check it out.  It wasn't a ton of fun and I probably wouldn't recommend going, but we enjoyed it because it gave us something to do and only cost us $20